Spoof news snippets from Thursday 26 February 2009
Obama vs Kramer!
Obama quote:- "There are us African Americans - full stop!"
Source - BET Networks - Direct TV USA - Channel 329
Obama Thanks Stevie!
Obama said "Stevie was brilliant on the Karaoke - it's a miracle how he does it!"
Source - US White House - Snoop Bug Transmitter 9
"The Hills Have Emphysema"
A California Childrens Advocacy Group has sued the makers of "The Hills Have Eyes III" to force them to remove all smoking scenes from the film.
Complete Idiot Improving
A complete idiot has made considerable progress in an asylum in Cookville, Tennessee and has now entered a Half-Wit House.
Moment Of Silence Interrupted
In Kabul, Afghanistan this afternoon a moment of silence for those killed in yesterday's suicide car-bombing was interrupted by a suicide car explosion.
WalMart Cracks Down
WalMart reported that they are hiring no more illegal immigrants as greeters unless they learn to speak English.
Thousands of internet users reporting this morning that every time they peck the letter "P" a sleazy website shows up. That's the letter "P".
ASPCA Protecting Sea Monkeys
Representatives of the ASPCA are now suing those people who sell sea monkeys through the mail.
Check Out Romania First
Police in Europe say that nearly half of missing children pictured on posters or on milk cartons show up at Gypsy camps.
Bush Getting Nostalgic
George Bush, apparently from nostalgia from the past, sticks his tongue out and rolls his eyes at Cindy Sheehan every time he passes her when leaving Texas ranch.
Serial Killer Arrested
The next door neighbors of a man arrested for being a serial killer describe the man as mostly "noisy".
No Chewing Tobacco In Class
After receiving horrible grades and their parents reaction to them, students in Miss Henrietta's junior high school class in Oxford, Mississippi decide to begin paying attention to the old cow.
Sir Fred Goodwin Laughs all the way to the bank
Sir Fred Goodwin has been asked by Alistair Darling, Chancellor of the exchequer, to forgo his £650,000 pension. His reply was: "I did say sorry, didn't I?"
Singer sung song so long
A busker has sung a little ditty continuously for 79 minutes to evade a traffic fine from LA Police. Officers pinned him up against a wall and demanded he sing or pay the consequences. What a gig!
UK to be downgraded in satisfaction poll.
The UK, currently 28th in the league of countries people like living in, will be downgraded to 44th when results are published later. That will change living standards from "crappy" to "nasty".