Order by:
Rating:

AIG Rescued

Invoking extraordinary powers granted after the 1929 stock market crash, the United States Government seized control
of rotten AIG insurance group Wednesday.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

U.S. Federal Reserve Bank Bails Out OJ

Thought he was just another, excessively risky financial institution going belly-up.

written by Jill The Shill, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Most Charismatic

According to a new poll of American Talk Radio Programs,
John McCain has been voted America's Most Charismatic
GOP Presidential Candidate since Herbert Hoover.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Lagasse Reveals Recipe

On tomorrow's ABC's "Good Morning America" Show, Emeril Lagasse plans to reveal the secret recipe of how the Brits make "Beans on Toast".

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Cult Suicide In London

In London, 128 members of a secret society committed suicide after watching Al Gore's movie, "An Inconvenient
Truth". Police say families of the "Pollyanna People" are now being told of the incident.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Parker Bros. Could Also Be In Trouble

London staff members were told to go back home yesterday as Lehman Brothers went into bankruptcy. Meanwhile, Parker Brothers Monopoly stated they failed to Pass Go during the second quarter.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Obama Dismisses VP

Barack Obama dismissed Joe Biden from his VP ticket this morning and replaced him with Rev. Jeremiah Wright. The two will immediately go on a tour called, "America's Chickens Coming Home To Roost".

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Wind Power Update

Scientists say they are nearing completion of a simple backyard windmill that will produce enough energy to run
every ceiling fan in your home.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Dr When?

A new series of Hisory programmes, will be written by Russell T. Davies. It will be called Dr When? Dr Where? a tourism prgrame, will replace Wish you were here in the Autumn.

written by Ben Macnair, 17 September 2008
Rating:

3rd Testament

A man in Arizona has found a version of the 3rd Testament on a CD in a hole in his back-garden. Police and Religious experts are looking into it.

written by Ben Macnair, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Silver Linings

In a bid to boost Tourism in Britain, tourism chiefs have developed a range of ground based clouds. Most people refer to them as Sheep, but then, what do they know?

written by Ben Macnair, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Scientists

Scientists have revealed that Blue M&M's taste no different to the green ones, in a scientifically controlled blind taste test.

written by Ben Macnair, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Kermit the Frog

Kermit the Frog, beloved Muppet of the 1970's has revealed his love for Sarah Palin.

written by Ben Macnair, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Razor Blades

Research and Development at Wilkinson Sword stopped the design of their new 99 blade razor, saying that it is too top heavy, and the handle is not long enough to support the design of it properly.

written by Ben Macnair, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Anxiety helpline

Fear of secrets? Fear of Fire? Fear of telephones? Fear of the present? Call our confidential hotline NOW!

written by Midgetgems, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Murder she wrote?

Jessica Fletcher, well known TV detective has denied reports that she has gone soft in her old age, and says that the newest books title 'A slight disagreement she wrote' is purely a co-incidence.

written by Ben Macnair, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Mobile fears

A new term to describe fear of being without a mobile phone has been introduced. The word is 'pathetic'.

written by Midgetgems, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Patriots Caught Filming Again

In sports news, the New England Patriots have once again been accused of secretly taping an opponent. This time it's the N.Y. Jet's Brett Favre wearing tight jeans, and selling them to female fans.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

New Product From Larry King

Nighttime CNN host Larry King has patented his "Old People's Smell" in spray cans to sell to underage drinkers
to use before going into liquor stores.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

McCain Credits Dole

Republican presential nominee, John McCain told reporters yesterday that he credits Bob Dole for his sudden rise in the poll. "He recommended these little purple pills", stated the Senator.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Dan Rather Book Tells All

A new book by fired CBS anchorman Dan Rather reveals that CBS actually stands for the "Collective Bull Shit" network.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

New Washington DC Rumour

A new rumour around Washington is that Republicans are holding back their display of Osama Bin Laden's head until the week before the November elections.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

St. Pete Pick-Pockets

Police in St. Petersburg, Florida are reporting several victims of pick-pockets at the two nudist colonies located there.

written by Bureau, 17 September 2008
Rating:

"Momas for Obama" Protest Palin Colorado Appearance!

The group known as "MF's", also love Jesse Jackson, Eliot Spitzer, Gary Hart, John Edward's, JFK, and all wide receivers in the NFL. MF's vote Democratic, claiming they have never been laid off.

written by Morse, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Report: Barbara Streisand Looks Down Her Nose at Palin!

In keeping with her Liberal Leanings, IT WAS A LONG, HARD LOOK....but the former Hilary Supporter was willing to cut off her nose to spite her face and host an Obama fundraiser anyway...Good Move!

written by Morse, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Democrats to Replace Presidential Candidate with Mickey Mouse

In an election year when the "in" party is perceived as having done a poor job, the "out" party should be able to run Mickey Mouse and win.


written by Philbert of Macadamia, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Americans Buy Bigger Mattresses

The extra space is needed, as money is removed from failing financial institutions and tucked underneath mattresses for safekeeping.

written by Gail Farrelly, 17 September 2008
Rating:

Hottie Palin Leaves Obama Speechless When Introduced at UN!

The scrappy Governor got right to the point, "Senator, I see you have a bone to pick with me....or are you just happy to meet me?" Wags noted Obama shrank 4 more inches in the poles and turned pale.

written by Morse, 17 September 2008
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