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Height of Confusion:

In what must be Height of Confusion; Today, two earthworms making love in a bowl of noodles.

written by IN SEINE, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Medicare

Hospitals have developed a new oral surgery technique for people with disabilities on Medicare or Medicaid. The surgeon describes the operation he would perform if they could afford it.

written by IN SEINE, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Government Policy

The controversy caused by the British Government's decision to downgrade Cannabis to a class B drug rages on. Tomorrow an all-party group of MPs opposed to the move will be issuing a joint statement.

written by IN SEINE, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Truth Revealed:

The 1962 assassination of JFK was done by the Grassy Knoll.

written by IN SEINE, 12 September 2008
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To avoid confusion

Prophet of Doom, David Icke wishes to make it clear that it is the hurricane and not his forthcoming tour of the state that threatens the lives of millions of Texans. "NO CONSPIRACY!" he said.

written by IN SEINE, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Reporter sentenced to death for typo

A reporter in North Korea has been sentenced to death for making a typographical error in the headline Kim Jong Il. Instead he mistakenly wrote 'Kim Jong Ill' which angered the elderly despot.

written by IN SEINE, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Better Off?

When asked if most people were better off than they were eight years ago, John McCain answered, "Of course not. We were all eight years younger then. Why, I was only a spry 97."

written by Bureau, 12 September 2008
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Dallas Signs Another One

In keeping with it's recent hiring of troubled football players, the Dallas Cowboys announced that they had bailed out, Billy "The Serial Killer" Bates who will be used as a
very offensive lineman.

written by Bureau, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Palin Ready

During her interview on ABC News, Sarah Palin announced that she was ready at any time to step in it as president,
but perhaps not as easily as the present one.

written by Bureau, 12 September 2008
Rating:

First Palin Interview

Sarah Palin, in her first interview with Charley Gibson, stated that if she got the 3AM call at the White House, she hoped it wouldn't be from McCain saying he'd fallen and couldn't get up.

written by Bureau, 12 September 2008
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Obama Apology Worsens

Barack Obama, still trying to play down the pig/lipstick remark yesterday, told reporters that if he had meant Sarah Palin, he would have said, lipstick on a cow."

written by Bureau, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Bipolar Disorder Ruining Woman's Life

A Nashville, Tennessee woman with a severe bipolar disorder has made her 127th trip from Hawaii to Alaska and back again.

written by Bureau, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Pope Apologizes

Pope Benedict XVI delivered a speech yesterday in which he not only officially apologized for priests who had molested young boys over the years, but also for the boner during the apology.

written by Bureau, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Priest Arrested Selling Cocaine at University of Illinois Rectory "store"

Saying he thought the drinking and drugging age had been lowered and legalized by a group of College Presidents, Rev. Chris Layden opened for business and was promptly arrested. The Pope is Pissed!

written by Morse, 12 September 2008
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Palin wants Russians out of Georgia

She thinks its important to protect other border States like Florida and South Carolina.

written by disciple, 12 September 2008
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Obama cites Lack of Education Øpportunities, Backs More Diploma Mills!

Citing the government's crack down on bogus diploma mills as the reason poor people can't get an education, Obama called for lowering tuition rates for an Oxford or Harvard degree from $2000 to$199

written by Morse, 12 September 2008
Rating:

A Frog, Thought to be Extinct, Found in Australian Tropics!

The man, now known as the Armoured Mist Frog, immediately surrendered when confronted by a superior force. Last seen in 1991, the man said he had been living off snails since emigrating from the EU.

written by Morse, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Poor statistics

Shock figures reveal up to 58% of statisticians may be wrong although the figure could be much nearer 79%.

written by Midgetgems, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Iran up to something

Iranian president Amhandin ... Ahmadeban ... Ahmedinaj ... Ah forget it.

written by Midgetgems, 12 September 2008
Rating:

Nuclear test

Sarah Palin can't pronounce the word 'nuclear' properly either. FAIL.

written by Midgetgems, 12 September 2008
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