Spoof news snippets from Tuesday 11 March 2008
British schoolchildren to 'pledge allegiance to a queen'
A new proposal by the Lord Chancellor would have schoolchildren pledging their allegiance to a queen, it emerged today. High-profile candidates include Sir Ian McKellan, Rupert Everett and the actor, Alan Cumming.
Prince Charles has claimed that he has been the victim of a forced marriage - TWICE!
Cheese and onion crisps 'addictive like crack'
A new study suggests that the humble cheese and onion crisp has the same addictive qualities as crack but is 100 times cheaper. The results may point to a new strategy to help crack addicts to beat their addiction.
Smoking ban 'has limited effect on parking'
The government's smoking ban in public places has had little effect on the parking problem in Britain's big cities, a new study has confirmed.
Beatles 'to split'
It has been announced that the Beatles have split after almost 50 years of playing together due to musical differences, band in-fighting and death.
Japan unveils car the size of a pinhead
The Japanese motor company, Honda, has announced that it has designed a family car so small it can only be driven by single-cell bacteria.
Jersey police find missing data discs
While searching for evidence of crimes committed at a children's home on the island of Jersey, police have confirmed that the missing data discs from the Home Office have been recovered.
McCann comes out in support of McCanns
Terry McCann, Star of eighties TV show Minder, has come out in support of Gerry and Kate McCann over their missing daughter Madeline. "Personally, I don't think they did it," said the friendly cockney hardman