Spoof news snippets from Saturday 23 February 2008
New, "Freakish" Animal Species Arrives At The Los Angeles Zoo
Last year, Kunga, a male Ugandan Lowland gorilla, was discovered mating with "Cathy," a "hottie" 30-year old zoo attendant. Zongo, a male, was born a month ago. The main controversy, however, centers around whether the progeny should be called a gorman or a humilla.
Muzzled And Leash Trained, "Dog the Bounty Hunter" Is Barking Again!
Duane "Dog" Chapman is returning to TV after his show was cancelled last year. "Dog" is set again to fetch those bad bail jumpers, starting this Spring. Good doggie! Now, go pee on a hydrant or a tree!
Porn Star dies
Scottish porn star Wayne Kerr has died from friction burns.
McCain Relaxes In Bath With Cigar And Rubber Duckies
As John McCain fights the battle to become the 44th President of the U.S., he is constantly stressed, trying, especially, to talk as fast and as loudly as Obama and Hillary. Solution: A relaxing daily bath with a big fat cigar and the three rubber duckies of his early years.
U.S.'s B-2 Stealth Bomber Crashes - Pilots Must Reimburse Government
A B-2 Stealth Bomber, each 1.2 billion U.S. dollars, crashed in Guam yesterday. The Air Force will make the two air jockeys pay for a replacement - and will have to work 6,000 years each to cover the loss.