Spoof news snippets from Saturday 24 February 2007
Bush Abolishes Presidential Term Limits
Washington, D.C. - President Bush, citing increasing criticism, announced the signing of a Presidential order abolishing term limits earlier today. The order also bans any future President's not named "Bush" from ever taking office or holding high level Government positions.
Asylum seekers sent to Australia's Christmas Island
- Santa Clause Prison Workshop awaits those who've been "Naughty, not Nice!"
Obama Mocks Cheney for Admiring U.K. Troop Drawdown
- Cheney responded, "Uppity, Uppity, Uppity!"
Study Moves Chimp-Human Split To 4 Million Years Ago
- The Fairy-god Mother and Santa Clause would agree!
Largest U.S. Dairy Shuns Milk From Clones
- "The problem is you get twice the phlegm as ordinary milk."
U.S. Airport Debuts Controversial X-Ray Scanner
- "Airport security workers call it, "X-Ray-ted TV"
Researchers Say Chimps Use Spears (NOT as in 'Britney') to Hunt Bushbabies
Democrats are surprised to learn that President Bush has babies but say they have no plans to hunt them down.
Florida Judge Lawrence Korda Says He's Unsure of His Jurisdiction in Anna Nicole Paternity Battle
His REAL reason for not taking the case? He doesn't like to cry in public.