Written by IainB
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Tuesday, 19 April 2011

image for Discovery Institute accidentally propose evolution by natural selection
Doh! Selection by nature, what a great idea

The Discovery Institute, the headquarters of militant wing of the Creationist movement, Intelligent Design, have accidentally proposed evolution by natural selection.

William Behe, the man behind irreducible complexity (that postulates if you take anything off a car, it ceases to be a car. Unless it's the satNav and radio, in which case it's still a car, you just can't find or hear it), has formulated a new theory to explain why the genomes of the chimpanzee and humans are so similar: Common Descent. In his latest best seller, Common Descent he explains over four hundred scintillating pages how one species, such as the precursor to chimps and humans, can become two.

The book is the final piece of the jigsaw that makes Intelligent Design a believable framework.

Previous work from the Discovery Institute hints at their understanding of the mammoth age of the Earth, how meteorite impacts, hydrogen-helium ratios in the sun, isotopic measurements of uranium, magnetic imprints and many more so called 'scientific' assumptions all manage to agree on an age of the Earth. The DI's work has calculated this to 4.456 billion years a week on Wednesday.

This has been coupled with Behe's new work and previous work from Michael Denton that shows how nature can select for certain traits, such as when there is a drought, or pollution on trees, favouring water retention and darker wings. Denton has called this Selection By Nature.

Now the Discovery Institute has combined all these strands, to explain how over billions of years, the simple life form that the Designer Designed, probably by using hydrothermal vents and some chemicals lying around, all the complexity of life around us has formed. Having built the first RNA strands, He watched as lions, sequoias and athlete's foot all descended, each descent governed by a little Selection by Nature.

"It's a masterpiece," said Richard Dawkins. "It's got me convinced. I wish I'd thought of it."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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