Written by Lady Godiva
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Topics: Texting

Friday, 21 January 2011

image for Texting can be extremely hazardous to your health or the health of others
When 'texting' don't try to multi-task

A recent survey, conducted by students at Newgateshaven University, has brought students to conclude that "Texting can be extremely hazardous to your health."

The students decided to carry out a survey of their own after reading about the shopper falling into a mall fountain whilst texting and walking at the same time.

It's not know if the lady was trying to multi-task. A passer by said she thought she'd observed the woman 'chewing gum' at the same time. This has not yet been confirmed.

The students' survey discovered that people admitted to texting:

a) during sex (this is dangerous for a number of reasons and may result in an unwanted pregnancy)

b) riding a bike/motor-cycle (this can result in running red lights - crashing into other vehicles or street furniture - knocking down pedestrians/double whammy if pedestrian is texting too)

c) eating fish and chips (one person surveyed said that he was struck above the eye -requiring 14 stitches- by a flying cell phone which someone had lost a grip on as a result of greasy fingers - eating fish and chips and texting at the same time)

d) cooking (a number of people surveyed said they had accidentally dropped their cell phone into hot oil, resulting in splashing-oil burns necessitating a visit to the Emergency Room at the local hospital).

e) walking on a treadmill (people have received injuries as a result of 'so-called' friends walking by and turning up the speed on the treadmill 'for a joke' when they saw someone texting. NOT FUNNY?)


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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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