Written by Mark James

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Monday, 17 January 2011

image for iPad 2 Rumors - Starbucks App Coffee Dispenser
Apple are trying a new antenna on the iPhone to improve call quality

Leading on from this morning's news over on Mashable that the next iPhone and iPad will have a Dual-Core Graphics Chip, we have had confirmation that the new iPad will incorporate a coffee dispenser for use with the iPad Starbucks app.

Fanbois will now be able to order a Double Venti Wet Triple Latte with Extra Shots and cream all over the place and it will pour straight out of their new iPad 2 directly into the optional iMug.

iPhone 5 will also incorporate similar technology although, due to size constraints, will only be able to provide users with an espresso.

iPad 2 will also feature an absorbent back so that spills of the iFrapamochaccino can be cleared up without embarrassment.

Insiders claim that the improvements to the devices will ensure that they stay at the top of their markets. iPhone 5, in particular, will boast a lot of new tech including the ability to show 3d movies without the need to wear glasses, stadium filling speakers, unbreakable glass touch screen and a battery that lasts 50 weeks between charges when being used continually.

An anonymous spokesman said 'We have invested billions into the iPhone 5 to make sure that nobody will come close for years to come. With the addition of the coffee dispenser and the optional iToastAndGrill attachment, there is now literally nothing that can not be done with an iPhone - apart from make a call. That may come in iPhone 7 or 8.'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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