Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Baby, Wales

Thursday, 30 December 2010

image for A Woman In Wales Gives Birth To A Baby Girl Weighing An Amazing 87 Pounds!
Swansea's Mrs. Dylan Thomas Hospital where the 87 pound baby girl was born.

SWANSEA, Wales - According to an article which appeared in The Swansea Daily Divulger newspaper, doctors at The Mrs. Dylan Thomas Hospital in Swansea have just announced that they delivered what is believed to be the biggest baby ever born in the world, or the free world at least.

Dr. Kardomah F. Penderry said that he and a team of three specialists worked for over five hours to deliver the baby girl that weighed 87 pounds.

After the unbelievable delivery the baby's mother identified as Myrtle Gretchen Milkwood was asked by one of the attending nurses how she was feeling. A hospital spokesperson said that Mrs. Milkwood was screaming so loud that no one really knows if she even heard the question or not.

The baby is resting comfortably in a twin bed, as the hospital nursery had no crib that could have possibly held little Lianelli as she has been named.

Dr. Penderry was asked by the Daily Divulger if he had ever heard of a a woman giving birth to a baby this humongously gigantic. The doctor shook his head and replied, no and added that not even full grown African elephants have babies that are this big.

The doctor did add that when he first looked down and saw the baby's head he knew that they were in for a long delivery. When asked what made him think that he replied that the baby had a massive head of hair underneath a red bandanna.

Dr. Penderry did note that after Mrs. Milkwood had stopped her vociferously deafening screaming and settled down somewhat that he asked her if there was anything that he could get her.

Mrs. Milkwood, who is only 29, and has eight other children, looked up at him and through half-closed eyes replied, "Yes, doctor yuckin get me, me bloody bloomin 'usband you can because I be fixin to divorce his blitherin, blimey fookin' butt I am."

In other news. The reports that the tiny African country of Kamgooganda is planning on invading Sweden have been proven to be false. A spokesperson for the Kamgoogandian government did note that it is actually Mexico that his country is planning on invading.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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