Written by P.M. Wortham
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Tuesday, 9 November 2010

image for Call of Duty - Black Ops; Cheat Codes Revealed
Warrior holding the remote control to the FIDO device

The long awaited sequel to the wildly successful combat game is set to hit store shelves next week, though insiders across the gaming community were shocked to hear that cheat codes for expanded weapons were made available today.

Insiders to the Call of Duty development team tell reporters that it was most likely a disgruntled background image artist that released the codes.

While nobody was willing to offer up the image developer's name, management at the Call of Duty design studios in California were quick to engage in damage control.

According to Director of Combat Action, Howie Stackim, no cheat codes were actually stolen or released:

"We're confident that this is just another tall tale from somebody looking to make a name for themselves out on the Internet. We don't do cheat codes. That would be cheating".

Beta testers who were brought in to validate the performance of the game prior to distribution disagree:

"Like dude. We tried a couple of the cheat codes and like BANG, instant weapons upgrade. I'm hosing down bad guys like nobody's business", says one tester who wanted to remain nameless.

Some of the cheat codes were released to this publication and are offered below without and implied or explicit warranty as to their validity or effectiveness. They are:

TOASTYPINEAPPLE - Unlimited incendiary grenades
CHEWBAKKA - Exploding trick gum for your enemy
HEDGECLIPPER - Unlimited ammo for the Gatling gun
SHRINKAGE - Shrink ray that miniaturizes enemy's twig and berries
FIDO - Lifelike mechanical dog, pees poison into enemy's cornflakes
HIGHNTIGHT - Ballistic hair trimmer that takes a little too much off the top

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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