Written by matthatt
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Friday, 17 September 2010

image for Local man gets taken roughly up the back passage by sat-nav
Well I'll be buggered.

A Local man seeking the golden beaches of Crapham Down, near Beachy Head, East Sussex, was disappointed when his GPS navigation system led him 400 miles off course, landing him instead, in the industrial northern town of Pisser Clough, near Widdop, West Yorkshire.

Not only did it take him to the wrong place but it also took him a most circuitous route to boot. At first, all seemed well as he left his home, just off Goat Lane, Enfield, the sat-nav directed his vehicle out on to the A10 and that's where it all started to go a bit "essential mix DJ" but he continued.

Before he knew what was happening, the local man found himself in the most unlocal of places, driving up dirt tracks and rat runs then eventually up a back alley in the back of beyond, he also noticed that the robotic voice of the GPS was talking in a very common manner, dropping its H's and stopping its glottals entirely.

It was at this point that the, now not very local man, looked at the packaging of the GPS, which he had purchased from a market stall in Middlesex, only to discover his mistake, which should serve as a stark lesson to us all, to check your sat navs caveat prior to parting with your hard earned cash, what he had bought was in fact a sat-chav.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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