Written by Morgan Truce
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Monday, 28 February 2005

image for Apple's Secret New Computer

CUPERTINO, CA (AP) Apple Computer is working on a completely new computer. It is rumored that the new design will completely revolutionize the computer industry. Few people have been able to glance at the new machine, but those that have are completely amazed. One insider says, "It's so simple, one can only wonder why this hasn't been thought of before!"

The project has been given the code name 'Macintosh'---not a big surprise given the name of the company. First reports of the new computer's specifications are somewhat mixed, but here's what we know as we go to press: 128 KB RAM, 64 KB ROM, a 3.5" 400 KB floppy drive, a 1-bit 512 x 342 pixel black and white monitor, a mouse, and two applications tentatively called MacWrite and MacPaint.

Jef Raskin started the design project for Apple wanting to create a graphics-based computer. "I named it for my favorite kind of eatin' apple, the succulent McIntosh. I changed the spelling of the name to avoid potential conflict with McIntosh, the audio equipment manufacturer."

Spoof reporter Morgan Truce was able to interview several people who actually used the new Macintosh computer:

"It's all in one box!"

"There's a ONE-button mouse attached to the thing!"

"You just click on these little pictures!"

"It's so easy to use, I love it!"

"That Macintosh is FUN!"

Spoof interviewed Bill Gates about the possible new competition: "Our Personal Computers will grind that new Macintosh thing into the ground. We will use every dirty trick in the book to make sure that our PC computers remain in the dominant market position. Microsoft has the best and most secure operating system of any computer."

When word leaked out on the street that Apple was about to introduce a new computer, people started lining up in front of computer retailers. One young woman said, "I have an Apple //e that I've been using for a few years. It's a great machine and I want to own the next thing that Apple puts out. I don't care if they call it "Golden Delicious"----I want it!"



A tip of the hat to Jef Raskin (1943-2005)


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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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