In an effort to show how green they can be, Vanson has introduced a new wireless battery re-charger that runs on batteries rather than through a wired connection.
"It's all about saving the environment," said Vanson spokesman Timothy Childress. "For too long, we have been dependent on imported electricity to re-charge our re-chargers. That all ends today."
How does it work? The battery re-charger can restore the strength of 2 AA batteries while running off of 2 AA batteries. After the 2 old batteries are charged, they can be placed inside the re-charger so that they can re-charge the 2 batteries that re-charged the original 2 batteries. "It's a great day for the environment," declared Childress.
"What," said 38 year-old consumer Dorothy Hammock, a mother of 3. "What the hell are you talking about? I recharge 2 batteries so that I can place them back in the re-charger so I can charge the ones I just used?"
It's true. The general consensus of the new product was met with scorn until Vanson marketing executives set the record straight, claiming that it was in fact possible to recharge batteries on battery power alone. "We're green now," Childress reiterated. "Not only do those nasty electric companies ruin our environment, they overcharge their customers!"
Upon hearing the rationale, Vanson Wireless Re-chargers went flying off the shelves. Said one Dorothy Hammock, "The environment is so important, much like our children. We must do all we can to protect them. And if buying a wireless battery charger keeps one tree alive or something, I'll buy one."
The Vanson Wireless Battery Re-Charger is available at all fine retailers for only $39.99. Batteries not included.