Written by Cuff
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Thursday, 15 April 2010

image for Govenor Scharzenegger Slain While Battling Apple's Iborg Phone!
Sorry but I won't be back!

Govenor Scharzenegger was killed today in Southern California after a vicious assault by Apple's latest tech toy the 'Iborg'.

Details are just now emerging but apparently there was a mix-up in delivery and the multitasking phone/pad was sent to Doctor Warwick E. Kerr who mistakenly thought it a new interface device for his scientific research.

Dr. Kerr is best known for mutating harmless honey bees into the murderous killer bees that are taking over the southern United States. Unwittingly he downloaded his research into the Iborg that was preloaded with special effect classics such as Star Trek: First Contact, Transformers, Virus, and of course Terminator as well as the popular television epic SG1.

The Iborg is equipped with a 200gig decepticon processor, godzillamodo cybertron nanite chip, an All Spark lithium EM field power generator, along with a trilaterilized interface that allows it to operate wireless on any system in any galaxy. In addition it has the first versatile cognizant A1A1O programming developed by Olaf Macdonald on his farm.

Kerr was confused with the device and left it unattended where it began to collate with the bees who suddenly began picking up pieces of junk, discerned what people fear the most, and then assembled a more versatile housing for the phone in the visage of Nancy Pelosi, replicate itself five thousand times, and finally accessed the mobile directory in search for anyone named Sarah Connor.

Sarah Connors around the country were immediately killed and unfortunately the late Governor will never say 'I'll be back' again. He was spotted as a threat by one of the Iborgs at a cake and pie sale developed to stave off California's imminent bankruptcy and stung a trillion times while screaming like a sissy boy.

President Obama immediately addressed the issue by demanding Congress to appropriate just under a trillion dollars to investigate a possible threat. Our advice is to upload a copy of the 12,567 page Health Care reform bill into the neural net. If that doesn't confuse the cuff out of the Iborgs nothing will otherwise resistance is futile.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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