Written by Cuff
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Topics: Sex, sex toys

Friday, 9 April 2010

image for New Vibrator Fights Cavities and Whitens Teeth
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Acting on a recent scientific study that claims ninety five percent of people, women and otherwise, that purchase a dildo use it orally Horny Goat Pharmaceuticals has developed the 'Megatasker'.

The ingenious idea uses a revolutionary toothpaste dispersion technique that not only guarantees cavity elimination and bright pearly whites but also complies with FDA and AMA mandates for over the counter health and beauty care.

By complying with the current codes the Megatasker will now be sold right next to Crest, Colgate, and other top toothpaste brands on grocery shelves everywhere thus eliminating the need for late night jaunts to the local XXX toy store.

If that wasn't enough the device is being praised by President Obama for its compliance to his HealthCare Reform's mandate for reducing health care costs and unnecessary medical testing.

The Megatasker is equipped with a sophisticated and proprietary technology that performs instant colonoscopy and bronchoscopy as well as Papanicolau testing for cervical cancer. Horny Goat Pharmacueticals is best known for its Liagra and Liagra II erectile dysfunction line and not having to pay taxes again, ever, but its spokesperson Tiger Woods had some items of caution.

"This is the most amazing breakthrough ever developed for early cancer screening but there are a few things to remember. First is that it is not necessary to use with a rubber but more important is that if you are checking out your colon and brushing your teeth we recommend to go teeth first."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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