Written by C. Cranium
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Topics: Spy, perfume

Monday, 22 March 2010

image for Meet women: Smell like a spy
What's that aroma?

Sneak around behind buildings, crawl under houses, jump off roofs, shoot pretend guns, drool, limp, bandage face, look extremely agitated, hide behind trees, go into sewer pipes, crawl in duct work, drink urine colored water (maybe its scotch), and wear dinner jackets.

Do one of these things and you're pretty lame and unattractive. Do all of these things and you will emanate four times your normal pheromones count.

You don't actually have to be a real spy; you just need to smell like one. Chicks will be all over you. They will be the right kind of chicks too - feisty ones who will melt when you touch them.

This reporter just visited a pre-marketing introduction of a new soap by Armani called 'Faux Espionage'.

Aroma scientists at Armani and volunteer Italian Secret Police have participated in a multi million dollar / multi year R&D project to find the secret to why spies can't fight them off.

It's the odd not-your-normal-day-to-day activities that launch the pheromone production. And Armani aroma scientists have been able to genetically engineer the scent in a full body wash soap.

Cologne wasn't enough. Full swing product production, of 'Faux Espionage', may be a year off due to the high cost of genetic engineering.

But for biology's sake, no price is too high.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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