Written by Wumf
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Topics: Earthquake, Time

Wednesday, 10 March 2010

image for Dramatic tectonic shift from Chilean quake alters time itself
One lucky Chilean farmer discovered that "The Hague" nows legally rests on his property

Santiago,Chile. In this South American country, the capitol moved 20 feet farther West. Buenos Aires also jumped just slightly Westward. But other issues connected with the shaking earth have appeared.

Scientists have calculated that the planet's day-length was shortened by a fraction of a second. This had led to unexpected problems such as students in classes speaking out of turn worldwide. Even polite Japanese students! Workers have been showing up inexplicably early and 3 minute eggs have been turning out underdone.

The land shift has caused chaos as property lines are found to be encroaching on a neighbor's yard and some communities finding themselves suddenly in completely new zoning districts. One formerly quiet Ecuadorian town will now have to completely reclassify itself as a landing strip. A Brazilian pizzeria has found out it is now an Austrian Embassy!

Scientists are working on a method to cause the earth to "Jump Back" (sort of like James Brown) and return the property issues to normal.

Greenwich Mean Time is now Greenwich "sort-of" Time.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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