Written by whatinthe world
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Topics: Farting

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

In a moment unequalled in the annals of history, a university researcher has bottled his own flatulence and utilised it to power a lawn mower.

Alex Lubic, a part time laboratory assistant, came up with the idea to bottle the anal gas, methane, while sitting on the "throne" and letting rip a few snorters. He then improvised a test tube and some rubber hosing clamped to his sphincter that enabled him to collect the primary source which was duly fed into the carburettor of a common lawn mower.

The resulting efficiencies were astounding to say the least and Alex asked his superiors to nominate him for a Nobel Prize for scientific engineering (of course they said "no"). Undaunted Alex Lubic says that using one's own methane has literally a million applications such as powering refrigerators, TVs and even personal computers.

The inspired inventor has released plans to generate electricity that, he claims, would be in enough quantities to power all of Eastern Europe. Lubic believes that methane will be the future and there's no going back.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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