Written by Thermophyle
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Topics: Barack Obama, life

Monday, 19 October 2009

image for Obama Extends Life Expectancy to 140 Years
Obama Declared "Perfect Human Being"

A new gene has been isolated in the serum of Barack Obama's blood that is believed to extend the worlds average life expectancy to 140 years. Scientist in Berkley, CA., studying Obama's blood have isolated a gene never before discovered in homo sapiens. This gene works on the mitochondria of the cell by causing the mitochondria to secrete and enzyme that prevents the cell DNA and RNA components from degrading or at least prolong the degradation that goes on.

Berkley Hematologist say that although they had recently theorized that such a gene could exist, they believed it to be impossible as it would have to exist in a theoretical perfect human being. This perfect human would have to have every cell and cell organelle to be without any flaws.

When asked his feelings about this new discovery, Obama with an air of Christian charity said, he regretted that this was all he could do for the world this week but would work harder for more advances for humanity next week.

The obvious repercussion of this discovery is to have all the world's populations live to an average 140 years causing overcrowding, housing shortages, and mass famine. Berkley scientist tell reporters they have no idea how to deal with these problems but say they feel confident Obama will show them the way.


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