Written by Frank Miller
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Topics: Space, Astronaut, urine, ISS

Tuesday, 1 September 2009

image for Urine Recycling: NASA gag makes astronauts angry
In Space, no one can hear you drink your own piss

Astronauts on the International Space Station were angry today after they fell for a practical joke from mission control.

They were told to test a special machine which would clean up their urine to make it safe and drinkable. The world watched as Mission control gave a toast to the space crew before falling about in hysterics when the astronauts drank it all down.

Unknown to them, the recycling machine didn't really recycle the urine, "It was basically an empty box with some flashing lights on the side," a NASA spokesman said, "It did nothing, urine went in and urine came out."

After waiting patiently through 10 minutes of realistic beeping noises, the crew were invited to fill their space beakers with the 'final recycled product'.

Mission Commander Miles Kendig said, "Wow, it tastes great, I can't believe I'm drinking my own piss!"

Neither could Head Mission Controller Jack Cates, "I'm speechless," he said, "duping highly trained space professionals into drinking their own urine was completely disgusting and totally unacceptable. I actually messed myself from laughing so much!"

Mission Commander Kendig was less than amused when he was told minutes later what he had really drunk. The video recorders were still running as Kendig told Cates he'd strangle him with own intestines.

Cates remains unworried of the death threats, "This sort of thing happens all the time, you think he's pissed now? Just wait till he finds out about me and his wife!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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