Washington (July 7) --- Earlier this morning President Bush revealed his new project. Lucky I happened to be hiding, at the time, in the white houses' front gardens. I was one of the first to hear the news. He stood out on the front steps and in front of only the very most important white house officials (and of course me) and announced that he would next be funding a NASA project to send men to Pluto.
"We tried to send the men to Mars but there was this whole too-much-heat-for-our-level-of-technology crap." Bush started, "So I thought where else could they go where the sun won't be a problem? Well, Pluto of course! It's cold and no body really knows what it looks like close up. Personally I wanna know what them white spots are on the surface."
That is all the important things he said.
The speech lasted three hours where he simply repeated himself over and over (of course he changed the wording and such). He ended by telling us that not only will Project Pluto (as he calls it) will be a complete success and a help for all of man kind.
NASA officials strongly disagree. They said "Project Pluto will not only be extremely expensive but this project is likely to fail. We tried to warn the President but he simply said that if we can travel through time then we can do this. We preceded to inform him that we haven't yet mastered time travel. He then looked at us surprised and asked why we lied to the world through that movie Back to the Future. We then looked at him blankly and walked away."
How will this project be funded? Through tax payers of course.
"All we have to do is raise taxes a bit. I'm fine with it I don't pay taxes," said Bush with a wink.
Will Project Pluto be a success? Will we make it to the frozen planet? Probably not. But one things for sure, we're all going to pay for it anyway.
By Renn K. Losan