Written by oiiopo
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Topics: Clone, Cloning

Thursday, 30 April 2009

image for First Human Cloning Factory Built
A pair of clones, chosen at random from the global population during alpha testing. This man suffered slight paranoia after.

Scientists at CERN have defected and begun to build cloning machines. Because of their superior knowledge and supermotivation, the first cloning factory was built on the 30th of April, 2009, 30 seconds after the idea was conceived.

"We're amazed at what we've done," said a scientist. "We've managed to create a machine so efficient, every person in the world will have their own clone for free by 2010."

The first to use the cloning machine was US President Barack Obama. He personally enjoyed the experience, and decided to make two hundred and three clones, one for every sovereign state existing.

"This is a first in government," said Obama, to an interview team. "Now every state will have their own Obama, and when CERN opens up its next 20 cloning stations, every human in the world will have their personal cloned Obama."

As the cloning machine was still in beta phase, there were some errors in the making. A clone of Obama with an inverted face was discarded, but was salvaged and was sold on eBay for two million dollars. Its whereabouts are now currently unknown.

The technology is due to be developed in another 2 hours, and then will be distributed globally to all major cities. The first public cloning machine will be open for use at Times Square, New York. The technology will then be sound, and the only problems users will have are anti-cloning laws. The CERN team are drawing up a waiver, but are finding it much more difficult than the actual invention of the machine.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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