Written by Jalapenoman
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Thursday, 30 April 2009

image for Doctors Discover Original Source of Swine Flu
Which one is Rosie and which is Oprah?

Medical Researchers at Johns Hopkins University, in conjunction with the Mayo Clinic, have discovered the source of Swine Flu. The outbreak did not originate in Mexico as was previously thought. In fact, the disease begin in Hollywood.

The outbreak has been narrowed down to a group of eight people who held a Union meeting at the Los Angeles Best Western Hotel Ballroom last winter. The meeting was held by the group PICTURE (Pigs In Cinema, Television, Univision, Radio and Entertainment). One of the group infected all of the others with a genetic condition that then evolved into a disease.

Surviving members of the group will undergo DNA testing to determine the culprit.

After their meeting, the group flew to the Mexican restort of Mazatlan for a photo opportunity and to relax and escape the harsh Southern California winter. It is assumed that the disease mutated in Mexica in the heat and humidity and spread from there.

All members of that group tested positive for having contracted the disease. Six are fully recovered, but two have died (Porky Pig and Miss Piggy).

Survivors of the group include Arnold Ziffell, Rosie O'Donnell, Roseanne Barr, Petunia Pig, Oprah Winfrey, and Hillary Clinton.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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