Written by Miko
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Monday, 16 March 2009

image for Little Things Please Massive Mnds
Like this, only much, much smaller (and slower!)

The worlds smallest HGV has been built by Professor Mildred Nbongo at Teenytech Electronics Hull, a leading Nanotechnology Company in the field.

The sub-atomic sized miniature lorry complete with articulated cab, tiny silver bumpers (front and rear), and microscopic, fully functionable solid oak trailer, is capable of speeds reaching 0.000001 MPH and can carry loads of up to one millionth of a nanocrumb.

The tiny truck has an incredibly small diesel engine, complete with 4 puny pistons and does a breath taking 40,000 mpg. The downside is that it takes an absolute age to travel the minutest of distances.

The amazing vehicle can be seen (through an electron microscope) at 'The Museum For All Things Tiddly' 23 Archer St, Hull.

I spoke with Professor Nbongo yesterday, she said: "Ever since I was knee high to a grasshopper I have been utterly fascinated by teeny-weenie-things. I am working on another project shortly, the world's smallest lawnmower!"

She muttered on.. "Imagine a common or garden Hayter Lawnmower, then reduce it in size again-and-again-and-again until you can't see it.. then, that is exactly how it will look - if you could see it that is. My wonderful little mower will be capable of mowing small to medium sized lawns, although one will need to stop for a fill up every once in a while."

"Yes," she sighed, "I love all things tiny.. just ask my husband."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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