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Topics: Bigfoot

Friday, 2 January 2009

image for Sasquatch, or just really big carbon footprints?
Harry Bigmon, standing on top of the hill where the massive footprints were found.

SEATTLE, WA - In what is considered to be the strongest evidence of Bigfoot yet, plaster casts have been made of giant footprints in the forests just East of Bellevue, Washington in the American Northwest.

The massive prints wind their way down some 300 yards of hillside. Further bolstering arguments for Sasquatch, fecal remains have also been found near the prints. DNA tests on this scatological evidence could prove once and for all this creature exists.

"This is very exciting!" said cryptozoologist Dr. Harry Bigmon. "These footprints are convincing enough as to leave no doubt they couldn't possibly be fakes. No one is capable of staging such an elaborate hoax."

Environmental scientists have been quick to discredit the alleged evidence, arguing that there is a far simpler explanation. They say the impressions on the hillside are merely the carbon footprints of major logging companies known to harvest softwoods in the area.

"At least 15 companies log timber near Bellevue, and they've clear-cut some hillsides, including this one. What we see here are relics of their activity, not evidence of Sasquatch," concludes Nora Mann, who has a PhD in environmental science, but not in cryptozoology. Nevertheless, she claims heavy logging has reduced many patches of formerly majestic forest to barren tracts in the area, producing carbon footprints just like these.

As for the fecal remains found near the prints, Mann says, "Oh, come on, now. That's just a bunch of crap, if you ask me."

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