GIZA, Egypt - Dr. Gaspar T. Ameri, secret CIA agent, canceled his keynote address on Secrets of the Ancients to meet secretly with TheSpoof.com. Dr. Ameri explained that they have been, for the last 5 years resurrecting mummies, using a newly discovered technique.
The technique uses the DNA in the mummy and aspartame. Scientists discovered that if they first converted the cells to stem cells, and then back into the specialized cells related to the location of the remains, that the missing cells would all be provided by growth.
"We were so shocked to see King Tut walk and talk!!!", Dr. Ameri ejaculated.
Dr. Ameri continued, "Why, he seemed to remember everything about his time period. In fact, he thought he was still Pharaoh. He wanted me to bow down to him. It took a long time to bring him up to speed. Years.",
"So, where is King Tut how", I asked?
"You know him as Barack Hussein Obama.."
At this point I ran screaming from the building to wire in my story.