Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: beauty, Wind

Tuesday, 7 October 2008

image for Boy Who Pulled Faces, Stays Like 'That'
You'll stay like that!

A six-year-old boy in Oldham who can't stop pulling ugly faces, had a horrifying experience this week when, after pulling his ugliest face to date, he stayed like 'that', just as his Mum had warned him he would.

It wasn't as if his Mum, Jackie, hadn't warned him enough.

"I'm always telling him!" said Jackie Gurney. "Thing is, he just doesn't listen!"

The boy, Luke Gurney, started pulling faces as soon as he was born, and regularly contorts his face into new and diverse positions that doctors have said, could leave him 'seriously ugly' for the rest of his days, especially "if the wind blows".

The incident last week though, has confounded even the medics. Jackie takes up the story:

"We were out at the park, and it was a particularly windy day. It were fair gusty. Luke started pulling his faces, and a really strong gust blew up. Before you could say 'Stop that y' little bastard!', it was too late. He was stuck with the face you can see in the picture. It's horrendous!"

Experts say that this is the first known case of a face staying like 'that' when the wind blows, despite parents having warned their children of its terrifying perils for centuries.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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