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Thursday, 4 September 2008

image for Microsoft unveil new game - Toon Wars
Mike Ashley consoles himself with a few beers.

Reading UK: Microsoft today unveiled it's latest game for the xbox 360 - Toon Wars - A Newcastle United Manager Sim type game.

The press release said - "Microsoft are pleased to announce that Toon Wars will hit the shelves in the UK in the next couple of days. It will be priced at a RRP of £3.50 reflecting the current price and state of affairs at NUFC"

A games expert, Jim Smith of Gateshead said that the game was a Football Manager sim like no other. "Users play as the manager who has to build up his team from obscurity in the lower leagues, to a proven premiership team capable of taking on the world. Along the way he will battle against new owners and their low spending plans, whilst trying desperately to keep hold of any criminals in the squad. Further battles along the way will be to keep wages to a minimum, so the owner can drink the profits; gather support from himself by way of appealing to the fans with his 'heart on his sleeve' comments; keep Alan Shearer out of the job and bring back Gazza from rehab"

Newcastle United made no official comment on the game, but a club insider said "Way aye man, this is so canny....I divna think that newcastle were so famous round the world like, tharra game would be brought out aboot us. I can see it doing well like, probably getting to mid table ya knaw. Funnily enough that's just like the real team"

Kevin Keegan, a games tester for the Toon Wars release said "I've played it and it's shite"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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