HNN REPORTS Recent studies have revealed that the average young man will experience at least 5 major bouts of testicle trauma during the span of his lifetime.
Master Baite of the G&G (Genitalia and Genital Foundation) is giving out free check-ups to any young boy or man who may just want to make sure. The former high school goalie is said to have the safest pair of hands so you are guaranteed that your balls are safe with him.
The trauma is usually to the innards of the Scrotal sack which is attached to to the penis. Pain usually occurs after receiving a hard blow. However, some men like to vigorously 'play' with their 'pecker', and although it heavily increases your hand-eye co-ordination, the action may result in heavy bruising and discomfort after the fun has been done.
If pain carries on for more than two to three days, you are best advised to muster up the balls and visit Master Baite who will fondle your nuts to check for abnormalities.
So for now, stay away from bore-huggers, jock straps, and angry women.