Written by Pointer
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Topics: Sex, Whale

Tuesday, 19 August 2008

image for Dr Ichabod Brainerd Discovers that Blue Whale Females Are No Different!
Female whales flip for baritones

Blue Whale females choose their mates based on size just like human hoes according to Dr Ichabod Brainerd, Harvard researcher who spent years whaling on his little joint until he stumbled upon the scientific theory that the human female will not mate with a little weenie. Once Brainerd went out and got himself a dick that matched his Brainerd and his mating experiments got much better results, he decided to apply the finding to his study of sea mammals.

Brainerd had noticed along with some other whale sex watchers that the male blue whale mating call had dropped in significant frequencies in pitch over the last decade or so. The males are singing bass when they used to be altos and tenors. Researchers were puzzled by this inexplicable change. That is, until Brainerd remembered his own epiphany about size:" What if the blue whale males have figured out that deeper tones suggest bigger boyz under the hood." Brainerd hypothesized as he once did about his own.

"I just hope the old girls aren't disappointed once they get a look under the hood!" Brainerd and his Harvard classmate have begun researching blue whale penis enhancement.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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