No one would have guessed that the universally recognized Worst President Ever, George W Bush would be the scientifically acclaimed savior of the obesity of the Ameri-can.
Studies have shown that the most serious threat to the health of the US population is the size of their cans. Nutritional experts have labeled the health epidemic Fatassedness Ameri-Canus.
The Bush engineered recession which looks like a full blown depression is causing US residents suffering from fatassedness to actually cut back on calories. The obscene price of fuel has them walking and biking again and the US populace are losing LB's faster than the shrinking population of Iraq.
The Nobel prize committee admits that Bush may outdo Gore as the most recent American to be honored with their coveted prize. Gore graciously conceded Bush's victory and thanked him for helping him cure his fatassedness.