Written by Simon Cockle
Print this

Monday, 21 April 2008

image for New bionic arse could help thousands
An impression of the bionic arse

A team at St. Time-on-its-hands Hospital, London, have made an amazing breakthrough by creating, for the first time ever, an entirely artificial bionic arse. The arse, clinical trials suggest, could perform equally as well as a real arse and, perhaps, better.

Dr. Fencing Stolen-Goods, the leader of the team, explained: "Many thousands of people currently suffer from broken arses, often through no fault of their own." The team, using the latest nanotechnology and keyhole surgery techniques, were able to construct an arse that can think for itself. "Imagine," said Dr. Fencing Stolen-Goods, "that".

The arse could be available to the general public in the space of five years and it is hoped that faulty arses could become a thing of the past. The same team were responsible for the bionic tit, bionic kitten and the short-lived bionic pasty.

Make Simon Cockle's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 1?

3 2 5 8
50 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more