Written by Warren Redlich
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Saturday, 19 April 2008

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Bush texts LOL

The White House will support a new standard for abbreviations to fit with modern text messaging. President George W. Bush reminisced about his experiences with acronyms in his youth while talking with journalists on Thursday.

"I've seen a lot of them. I was AWOL from the Reserves, and then I had that DWI. My bff Cheney had a couple of those himself. Plus lots of folks call me W."

Some White House staffers have been pushing Bush to use more abbreviations to ease the burden on communications for those who type on cell phones. The President is thought to favor the idea because it would reduce his reading load.

A number of prominent Democrats also support the idea. Al Gore said he invented text messaging to reduce global warming. Barack Obama, known to be in tune with young voters, sponsored a bill for it in the Senate.

Republicans Ron Paul and Bob Barr oppose texting, though Paul says he would consider it if the Constitution were amended.

Future White House documents will all be in text form. Late Friday a test release announced "TGIF @ RG. C u l8r"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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