Written by Bruno Murphy
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Friday, 28 March 2008

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After long years of research, and one too many beers, the researches at Fartinston Labs finally have answered the question. Which sport hits harder Rugby or American Football. The answer is mixed but comes as this, more damage is done to a rugby player per hit, but American Football reigns supreme on the amount of force at impact.

The findings are being supported by the rest of the known scientific world. With the amount of effort placed into the studies the fellow scientist applauded Fartinston Labs for tackling the hard topic.

"We had problems right from the get go, with this study. Even out of the pads the average size for an NFL athelte is well over 6'5" and weighs close to 350lbs. While the average size for a Professional rugby player is a much more realistic person of 6'0" and weighs only around the average of 250lbs. So what we did was collected a full rugby team and then collected NFL players of the same size for an equal number. Then we had them go at each other with sensors to check for amount of force. This whole process took us years to profect. We went though 2 squads of American Football Players and 55 squads of Rugby players. We also found out that NFL players are a little on the meaner side of things. While rugby is a brutal sport with their average force being equilavent to running headlong into a brick wall at full speed. American football took the cake when the amount of force was equilavent to being in a head on collision at 35 mph," stated one of the labs scientist.

Other important information was found in the studies as well. The pads on an American Football player dispurses the force over a broader area of the body. Rugby players of course take the full brunt of what ever hit they are given, but their areas of damage are kept in what ever part of the body that is struck. While the majority of the force is placed in the area of the hit in American Football. A large amount of force is displaced into the pads worn. So for balls Rugby players get the nod of champions. For pure power American Football reigns supreme. The next topic that Fartiston Labs is looking to tackle is the average intelligence between Footballers (soccer) and hockey players. So far the scientists says that some surprising results are being found.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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