Written by Tiki Murphy

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Topics: Science

Friday, 29 February 2008

image for Dr. Harry Boogart is a Fraud!
Brahn Knowser, "Size really doesn't matter."

According to Dr. Slique R. N. Snaught, a long time rival and colleague of Dr. Boogart, Dr. Boogart is a fraud. It seems that Dr.Boogart is a "idiotic, glory seeking, stupid as a box of rocks, never going to be anything, nitwit," according to Dr. Snaught. Through the years Dr. Boogart from pre-school until today, has stolen from Dr. Snaught.

"The man doesn't understand half the things he does, says, writes or reads. If he can even read. He stole my Nose Picking research years ago. When it was just in the beginning stages. At first, I was a firm believer that not everyone can pick everyone else's nose. However, during the course of my research, I have found the error in that line of thought," Dr. Snaught told reporters.

Apparently, had Dr. Boogart waited, and stolen the research at a later date, he would have discovered the Stretch Factor of human nostrils.

"Research has indicated that the human nostril is very strectchy and resilient. I mean have you ever had that booger you just couldn't quite get, and had to dig it out? That in itself is a testiment to the strength and fortitude of the nostril. It's really a most fascinating subject," said Dr. Snaughty's research assistant Brahn Knowser.

So, studies are now showing that yes you truly can pick your friends nose, regardless of the finger size to nostril size ratio, that Dr. Boogart has previously mentioned.

There is no word yet on whether Dr. Boogart will be keeping his Nobel Prize for Nose Picking. An investigation is pending. A top team of scientific investigators will be looking in to who should have that prize. May the best nose picker win.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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