Written by King David
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Topics: Christmas

Tuesday, 25 December 2007

image for Three wise men depend on OnStar
OnStar may be installed in your camel's hump, or in thier anus; but caution must be exercised when installing in the late

Three wise men were reported last night by the Jordanian Desert Patrol traveling east from Najd and the Arabian Peninsula on camels through the Syrian Dessert at pretty fast speeds.

Apparently, they were in a hurry to watch camel races being held in Jerusalem which were in the national semi-final stages and to drop by and see a Jewish savior along the way who was reported to have been born to a virgin and a frustrated husband in a manger in Bethlehem.

The maji who were traveling without lights and a limited supply of food and water, were reported to have used their OnStar camel toe navigation devices to find the savior, pick up some dates and go to the races.

"We didn't want to get lost," said one of the men. "We were carrying a lot of perishables."

The perishables were gifts to be given to the savior--Harry and David pears, Gerber baby food and Enfamil infant formula to be given to the savior's mother, Mary who was not lactating because she was a virgin.

The three wise men, also Zoroastrian priests, were proficient in astrology and Zorastrian Holy text, but decided to have the OnStar systems installed just as a safety precaution.

"The dessert is no place to get lost at night," said one of the maji, "one cannot take any chances."

Wireless OnStar camel toe navigational devices may be installed in one of your camel's humps, or in his anal cavity. However, caution must be exercised when installing and using OnStar in the rear. Too much activity and use on this front can cause disatrous consequences.

It is highly recommended that your system be installed in the camel's hump. This way it will receive the best reception. OnStar also features a hands-free calling service.

The three wise men were reported having safely arrived to their destinations and are staying at the Bethlehem Hyatt Regency Hotel where they were seen this morning hanging out poolside, listening to pop music on their Ipods and watching televised camel toe races sponsored by SAND DIAMOND, the Palestinian equavalent to American's NASCAR.

"Who wants to stay in a smelly old stable?" said one of the men.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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