Written by Nathan Cooper
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Topics: Health

Sunday, 5 August 2001

image for Folic Acid Good, Home-Made Acid Makes You Crazy

A medical report published last week states that the popular supplement taken by pregnant mothers may raise the chances of a pregnancy resulting in twins. Many women take folic acid during pregnancy to prevent their child from getting spina bifida or other birth defects.

In similar health news, a random street poll of the homeless and destitute found that the popular street drug known as acid tends to make people crazy. The street drug, which is popular with teens, can attack the central nervous system and have an adverse effect on normal brain function. Acid is often made in the cheap home laboratory of a drug dealer. Known acid addicts who were interviewed for the study provided some scientific insight into to chemically damaged brain. One addict, who stated his name was Jesus Christ, said, "Flibbity be the Hizz-up." Another addict had this to say about his dependency, "Look out man, the giant head of death is tellin' me to stab somebody. Ooh, your watch is shiny."

While having twins can be a blessing for many families, the question must be pondered; does having twins increase the chances that at least one of your children will be hooked on acid? There are currently no studies on this topic, but future research may be advised.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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