CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Space, the final frontier - Cassini-Huygens at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory California Institute of Technology has reported music from Saturn, proving once and for all that God is a D.J.
These emissions were detected by the Cassini radio and plasma wave science instrument.
The complex radio spectrum with rising and falling tones being picked up on the Cassini radio and plasma instrument proves that God is a D.J. and that he prefers radio and plasma instruments to the now-popular Ipod and satellite radio receivers. Since the frequencies of these emissions are well above the audio frequency range, it is suggested that you tune in at -44 on your radio dial for all of God's future broadcasts.
It is speculated that this was revealed now because, with the Beast in power, the end is near and Armageddon is at hand. It is advisable that everyone listen to their radios for God's latest live update, especially in radio-free America.