Scientist have revealed findings, in the journal 'Science stuff', which show if there are any men on mars they would have to be really small.
The research was done by a team from Hull University; lead by Doctor Alan Nelsborne, who made some remarkable discoveries.
By studying Mars' gravitational field, its alignment with the sun, and the size of the rocks that something could hide under, as well as photographs of the planets surface, the team discovered that if there were any men on Mars they would have to be small enough to stand under a three foot high boulder.
This further confirms research carried out last August by the Mars orbiter which showed that all life on Mars would be small and cockney. While this research seems fairly conclusive as to the possible nature of any men on mars, it still remains to be seen if there are any.
NASA is currently preparing a mission to Mars manned by cockneys, who should be able to locate their fellow 'pile of spam: rhyming slang' speakers.
However some doubts have been raised as to the authenticity of the photographs used for the research with some people claiming that they were digitally edited to hide signs of massive colonisation. These rumours, circulated on you-tube are more likely to be true due to that particular sites firm vetting policy for only the truth to be shown.