LONDON (Defecated News) - A Cornish pasty-making factory and national undertaker have teamed up to provide a sensitive yet alternative service for people.
NecroPasty UK previde a service in which the remains of dead family and friends can be safely transformed into a NecroPasty.
"We got the idea a couple of years ago", said Chairman of NecroPasty and former pie-maker Bernard Crabbins. "We saw this thing on Discovery where people had gotten the remains of dead folk converted into diamonds to stay with them forever. This is just plain silly and quite scary"
What makes their pasties different, they say, is that once frozen, the pasty will remain fresh and can be a companion to guide people through the grieving process. After twelve months, it goes off and start to smell, so meaning it must be thrown away or given to the homeless.
"This allow the loved one to discard old unhelpful feelings and get on with their life", said Co-chairman and former undertaker Leslie Crayther.
Local health and safety officers have expressed reservations and wonder whether the pasties may get accidentally eaten.
"We've dealt with that", reassured Crayther, "All NecroPasty products will be sealed in unbreakable plastic and with the writing DO NOT EAT, CONTAINS AUNTIE MAUD, for example."