Cape Canaveral, Florida (IP) - Our investigative reporter was recently taking a tour of the Kennedy Space center. While he was in the men's room his tour bus left without him. He knew another bus would soon come along and so he began to wander around the massive Vehicle Assembly Building (VAB) which is so large that it can actually rain inside.
As he walked around he noticed that there were two space shuttle shaped tents and decided to investigate. He lifted the material covering one of the spacecraft and was almost knocked down by a strong chemical odor.
There was a warning sign he had not noticed earlier and the sign said "WARNING - TERMITE POISON IN USE . Just then a technician saw our reporter and demanded to know what he was doing there. Our reporter pulled out his trusty old whisky flask and offered some to the technician.
Before long they were chatting in a friendly sort of way and the technician confided in him that the shuttles were actually made of balsa wood and the rest of the system was made of card board. NASA had resorted to using the light weight materials because of funding problems.
The technician then told our reporter that the termites do not actually eat the spacecraft but that they actually threaten the shuttle verbally. "How in the world do you know that?" our reporter asked. "These are no ordinary termites. They came from Balsa wood planet TrES-4 and they are angry because NASA will not let them borrow the Shuttle for a return trip home" replied the technician.