Academics at the London University New Academic Terminology Information Centre (L.U.N.A.T.I.C.) have announced that their 20 year search for the "Question that has no answer" has finally ended.
The question, first shown at the L.U.N.A.T.I.C. annual conference in Whitby Bay last year resulted in a team being locked away to try and find an answer.
"We think we do have the question which has no answer" beamed a slighty bleary eyed Professor. "Despite the combined efforts of England's leading academics, Leading Dictionary owners, Department of Culture,and various famous authors no answer has been found"
The Government have been quick to slap an infamously murky D Notice on the question stating it would also be protected under the "Official Secrets Act".
Members of the Intelligence Services have also been drafted in to bug various key peoples homes to eaves drop on any informal discussions in the hope a solution can be found.
The question in question has been leaked to The Spoof by an unnamed Under Secretary in the Cabinet Office. The question to which there is no answer is: "What is the opposite of opposite?"
Oxford & Cambridge, Collins and Wykpedia have offered £100,000 for the first person to give the answer.
"The money's safe as houses!" crowed MD David Vernastein.
What is opposite to opposite...
The Government has also announced there will also be investigations into other mysteries..
Other subjects under scrutiny include: Why are wrong numbers never engaged? What was the best thing before sliced bread? And why are bees knees so special?