NASA (formerly the National Aeronautics and Space Administration) admitted today that several astronauts have been launched into space in a "less than sober condition." Though none of these astronuats died in their missions or caused damage to their space vehicles, they would have been cited for a D.W.I. had they been driving their cars.
A spokesman for NASA (now short for Need Another Stout Ale) said that the astronauts were permitted to lift off in their inebriated state for the following reasons:
- They don't call the drink of the astronauts "tang" for nothing.
- Scotty was always drunk on Romulan Ale or Scotch on Star Trek.
- We wanted to see if any cops would try to pull them over.
- You've got to be soused to join our version of the mile high club with some of our ugly women astronauts.
- Everyone drinks like it's their last day on earth because it's their last day on earth!
When asked if NASA would continue shooting drunk astronauts into space, they responded by saying "considering our track record the last few years, do you really think we could get anyone sober to fly our birds?"