Mt Palomar, California (IP) - Scientists from this campus have set loose a team of specialists to seek out a woman with a sense of humor. This team is composed of all damn Mexicans because of the rising cost of hiring English speaking technicians at affordable wages. Mexicans are also able to work long hours without getting tired and thirsty. In the future a team of technicians will be sent out to try to find out if any Americans are actually working for a living but that is another story for another day.
Forty-seven Mexicans were sent out in one Chevy van to scour the country side and also urban locations in an attempt to find a funny lady. They have been trained in such humorous tactics as singing Pink Floyd songs with heavy Mexican accents and other songs whose words they can sing without having a clue as to the actual meaning of the words. A few were trained to say "We dong need no stinkin badges" which always gets a laugh from the guys but never from women.
Other techniques that they employ include making farting noises and playing recorded phrases from the "Pink Panther" and from "In Search of The Holy Grail". These phrases always make men laugh so hard that they have to hold onto their sides while never eliciting so much as a smile from the ladies.
It is hoped that if the Immigration Department catches any of these technicians that the agents are men. It would be frightening to think what will happen if the agents turn out to be women. The technicians have been taught not to stare at women who hold positions of authority and this may ward off any potentially violent situations.