Written by Cal Jennings
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Monday, 25 June 2007

image for Animal House - Return to Atlantis
Mouse with human brain cells who replaced George Bush

CCN (Crazy Cal News) - The recombination of man and beast - According to an article Animal Farm, scientists are touting their accomplishments regarding placing human cells in mice and other animals.

The scientists say that they are considering creating creatures that are part human/part animal through genetic manipulation. We at TheSpoof.com HATE to BREAK it to them, but better stuff than this was done YEARS ago, DECADES ago, CENTURIES ago, even.

When Cal-el last traveled back in time by flying faster than light against the rotation of the Earth, he was witness to the creations at Atlantis. They had creatures such as the Ichthyocentaur - the upper half of a man, the forelegs of a horse or lion, and the tail of a dolphin, the Bunyip - hairy, scaled, feathered, fur, long tail, long neck, horse head, bird head, the Sea-Horse - Front half is a horse, back half is sea creature, the Satyr - Half man, Half goat. Bearded, sometimes with horns or goat's ears, the Yppotryll - type of camel or dromedary, found in heraldry... Often described as having a boar's face and tusks, and the legs and hooves of an ox, the Moon Woman - A woman who lays eggs, and sits on them, hatching giants, the Nereid - Sea-nymphs who would frolic on the surface of the water, and they had golden hair, the Werewolf - if you don't know this one, I'm not going to tell you, the Su - A wild beast from Patagonia that has a broad tail and carries its young on its back, the Goat-Headed - man with horns and hooves of a goat, the Sea-Monk - a large fish with a human head, the Cockatrice - a dragon with the head of a lion, the Behemoth - a large animal, like a hippopotamus, the Ibex - A mountain goat with 2 large, long horns that extend backwards, the Elephant Headed - a human with an elephant's head... I could go on and on.

It's amazing that our scientists think they are so advanced when they are just now catching up to technology that people had in 9400 BC. I wouldn't say we're advanced. I'd say we have some catching up to do.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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