Written by Moose&Squirell

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Topics: Sex, Robots

Thursday, 18 January 2007

image for Japan Develops Innovative Female Sex Toy
She's Like A Sex Dispensing Coke Machine!

SUKMA, WIGWAG, JAPAN - From the country that's brought us, Kabuki Dancers, Bonsai Trees, Karate, Sushi and Pokemon, have now come up with the ultimate sex partner. Developed at Suzuki Laboratories University Tech (SLUT), these cunning & creative engineers have rubbed their collective heads together on this one. The fruit of their loins research, has created, SUKI. The first ever human-looking female prostitute android.

"After putting in your debit, credit card or cash, the robot comes to life. When she turns to you and whispers, "Shogun!", she means it.", describes Project Director, Poon-Tang Wang, "After being kissed by her TEFLON-soft, cherry-blossom lips of red, you'll be reciting romantic Haiku in no time."

The "Fire-Walled" fem fatale can replicate a variety of massages. Prepare to be folded and bent like Origami has never been twisted before. She performs the familiar oriental to a pampering-ego massage which will leave you quivering like tofu on a warm Summer day.

Pre-programmed to perform a broad array of sexual acts and motions, its creators say SUKI, will give you hours & hours of good clean fun.

And I guess the clincher for me is - there'll be no need to say, "Thank you & good night."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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