Washington, DC "I got tired of all these disasters upstaging me and getting all the press. It was time SOMEBODY stood up and did something about all these hurricanes and earthquakes EVERY YEAR! Well, now it will be illegal for that to happen. TAKE THAT EVIL WEATHER! I've got my eye on YOU! Especially you tornados-you're next!" tweeted Trump.
"What makes you think you can get rid of bad weather and disasters by making them illegal?" asked Daily Planet reporter Jimmy Olsen. "If that were the case, why wasn't it done before?"
"Obama knew how to do it but he didn't have the balls to do it like I do!" said Trump.