Written by queen mudder
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Thursday, 20 February 2014

image for Giant sinkhole under Bristol Channel sparks 4.1 magnitude quake
The Bristol Channel's Severn Bore NOT the same as a regular Twelve Bore

Bristol, UK - The major inlet, also known as the Severn Sea, was designed to separate the UK mainland from hordes of marauding Welsh by harnessing the power of the Severn Bore, a large surge wave in the estuary of the local river.

This afternoon there were reports that a huge sinkhole, possibly caused by flood-related land slippage, is the likely culprit behind a 4.1 magnitude earthquake under the Bristol Channel which forms part of the Bore.

"Sinkhole? You can blame the daft Prince of Wales for that one," local wise-ass Sadie Strupnik told the lunchtime TV news amid reports that Charles was responsible for yet another mess.

The Pretender's role in screwing up the weather had being studied since 1975 by seismologists from the British Geological Survey, charged with sifting through today's geo-data.

A statement released at tea time said up to a dozen sinkholes had recently formed a chain reaction resulting in today's quake which shook a large swath of countryside including Dartmoor, Bristol, Taunton, Swansea, Llanelli, Barnstaple, Gloucester and the heavily flooded Somerset Levels.

More tremors are now expected to hit the flood-ravaged UK with the Tory Home Counties stronghold of the Thames Valley topping the list for a major rattler.

Camilla Fucker-Proles is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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