Written by Gail Farrelly

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Thursday, 12 September 2013

image for Twitter Birdies Channel Elvis As They Twerk Instead of Tweet
Even a President thought he had the moves!

Having problems lately with timely delivery of your tweets? You're not alone.

Gail Farrelly, a science & technology reporter at TheSpoof.com, has found out that the Twitter birdies, wanting to thumb their beaks at management for labor complaint issues (no paid overtime, infrequent breaks for eating and drinking, no company-furnished raincoats and umbrellas for bad-weather flying), have taken matters into their own wings and are spending more time twerking, instead of tweeting. Farrelly, skilled in bird talk, got the story straight from the mouth of the head bird (that would be Bill Twitter, the president of the Twitter Birdies labor union).

"The birds really enjoy twerking," confided Mr. Twitter, who commented, "They find it a nice, loosey-goosey, activity. It relaxes them." And their role model may surprise you. According to Mr. Twitter, his union membership is not at all interested in modern-day twerkers. Miley Cyrus? "Oh please, dump her back in the world of Disney," the head bird chirped, continuing, "my birdies are fans of the late, great, swivel-hipped Elvis Presley." With a little wiggle and an excited flutter of his wings, Mr. Twitter added, "Now there was a guy who really knew how to twerk. I mean, he was doing it in the 50s, before the word twerk had even hit the dictionary."

As Farrelly ended the interview, she was thinking of what Roy Orbison once said about Elvis: "He was the firstest with the mostest."


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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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